Sunday, July 15, 2012

I've got this...

                I find it fascinating when we teeter on the precipice of something new.  It’s a heady mix of exhilaration and fear that brings life into pinpoint focus.  It is almost intoxicating.  There is so much wonder and curiosity.  Can I do it?  Will they let me?  Will I fail?  All of these questions and more darting around and chasing each other’s tails through your mind.  It’s these moments that really make us live our lives.  That moment before soaring success or crushing defeat that lifts a person above themselves and shows them a third alternative that is filled with endless possibilities. 

                So I suppose most of my faithful readers are wondering what is making me wax poetic about the possibilities of our futures.  Let me keep you in the dark no longer.  Tomorrow I interview for a promotion.  It’s a promotion I think I deserve (but then who doesn’t think that when they’re in line for one), it’s a promotion that I’ve been spending the past three years really preparing for and the last six years desiring.  I’ve taken some bumps along the way and I’ve made some mistakes all of which have made me stronger and wiser (what bumps and mistakes don’t).  As I woke this morning starting my prep for the big event tomorrow at 9:45 am PST I’ve begun shaping answers to phantom questions.  Readying myself to put voice to the hidden (or not so hidden if you happen to be married or related to me) confidence that resides, like a small ball of flame, at the core of who I am. 

                Right this minute as I type this, failure is not an option.  I know it’s a possibility but it’s not an option I’m willing to think about because this is something I want.  Nay, this is something I honestly need.  New places, new people, new experiences….the thought of these alone are enough to overwhelm and make me giddy like a young me on Christmas morning walking into the living room and finding the Millennium Falcon toy  waiting for me.  I’m ready for this and I think the District I work for needs me to be in this position.  They just don’t know it yet….but they will by 10:30am tomorrow morning.  I’ve got this!

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